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Healing And Hope After A Broken Heart Writer/submitter Kat Kehres Knecht writes:
Many of the women who seek my guidance as a relationship coach are suffering from a broken heart. In this article I share my own broken heart story and what I learned about healing and hope.
Divorce is a tumultuous time. You may find yourself thinking and doing things that are way out of character for you. I remember when I was involved with a divorce support group hearing many of the participants say “ I just don’t know this person anymore.” And they are right!
Whether you are still in the same house together, negotiating a possible settlement, avoiding friction for the sake of your children, or simply trying to keep your blood pressure down while your case works its way forward through the court, your own perspective and conduct can make a big difference to your strategic situation and your quality of life. These suggestions might be useful to help you to avoid making a bad situation worse, or – better still – to turn your experience into a source of personal strength and growth.
Divorce mediation saves a lot of money versus the traditional approach to divorce where each spouse is represented by an attorney. The main reason is that in mediation the "parties" negotiate directly with each other, rather than through their lawyers. Using an experienced attorney that is also a court-approved mediator offers several advantages versus working with someone trained only in mediation.
Whether someone should stay in the marital home, or leave, before or during a divorce has nothing to do with whether that person will give up his or her right to the home. Instead, this decision should be based upon much more practical considerations
Trying to "punish" your spouse during the divorce for all the ills of your married life can be time-consuming, expensive and emotionally exhausting, but rarely worth the price you'll pay. Family Court judges have "heard it all" and unlikely to extract a significant price upon the misbehaving spouse. With rare exceptions, most property splits are still 50/50.
“Is it okay if I go out on a date?” asked my client, “John”. He had filed for divorce and taken his own apartment. “After fighting with my wife for two years, “I’d like be to be with someone who is glad to have me around.”
Divorce Secrets Revealed to Friends, Even Therapists Can Come Out at Trial
“Joyce” was on the witness stand and clearly uncomfortable. She had been subpoenaed to testify at the divorce of her best friend, “Monica”, and was being forced to reveal what Monica had confided to her. Thankfully, Monica had not been unfaithful, but she had confessed that the divorce was wearing her down, making her depressed, and affecting her ability to care for her two young children.
Recently I spoke with a woman whose coaching practice revolves around the issue of children and divorce. She had many useful strategies for dealing with this challenge but what it all seemed to come down to is this: if you love your children more than you might hate, resent or simply dislike your ex, then you are called upon to act with their well-being first and foremost instead of any hard feelings you may harbor against your former spouse. You must be a bigger person that the issues surrounding your divorce.
With the increasing number of families experiencing divorce, it is exceedingly important that professionals such as lawyers, accountants, financial planners, therapists, judges, and child advocates, do whatever possible to protect the best interests of all parties involved, particularly when there are children concerned. The collaborative divorce process provides a support system that incorporates the needs of the children as well as the financial and emotional issues of the parents
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Karl Augustine
Brooks House, LLC
Issaquah WA 98027
Phone: 425.890.6545
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